A new client recently shared that over the next two weeks, his intention is to “speak from the heart when guided.”

He said that he often feels shy about admitting the full scope of his spiritual work in the world, and he wants to develop the self-compassion and courage to speak from the heart and share his truth when he feels called.

Many of us have a message or a calling that we want to share with the world, but often, speaking from the heart is scary. Putting yourself out there in a big way can feel vulnerable and overwhelming. And if you’ve ever been criticized by a loved one, or if you have a harsh Inner Judge, it can feel easier to avoid talking about the true depth of your work in an attempt to protect yourself.

Being able to speak from the heart and share your message with the world is a skill every courageous leader must cultivate in order to fully live their calling and make their greatest impact on the world.

If you find that shyness or fear are holding you back, here is the five-step process that I shared with my client as he began embracing the act of speaking from the heart.

Step One:  Acknowledge and embrace the part of you who feels shy and scared about sharing your message.  

It can help to imagine this part of you as a scared child who only wants to hide under the covers.  When we don’t comfort a child but instead scold them to “Just get over it!  There’s nothing to be afraid of!  Come out here now!” that child will want to hide even more and will feel even more scared to speak up.  With this in mind, I invite you to begin by simply having compassion for the scared and shy part of yourself, not trying to change him or make him any different than he is.  Eventually, with this comfort and compassion, this part of you can begin to feel ease and relief from his fear.

Step Two:  Identify and transform the thoughts that hold you back.

To begin, it’s important to understand that self-compassion is our birthright; we are born accepting ourselves and everyone else.  The self-critical messages we tell ourselves are things that we’ve been taught to believe; they are not true, and inner Judge who criticizes us is not who we truly are.

I invite you to take a moment to identify the messages that your inner Judge tells you to make you feel scared and shy.  For example, your inner Judge may tell you that your work is too “out there,” your purpose “too big or too bold,” and that you are “too young and too human.”  No matter how convinced of the truth of these stories you may currently be, I invite you to realize that any story that holds you back from expressing your full self does not serve you.

Finally, ask yourself, “What story about speaking from the heart would serve me more?”  For example, you might choose to tell yourself, “Of course my message is big and bold and out there.  The world needs powerful change right now, and what an amazing opportunity to be given this gift at such a young age, when I still have so much time ahead of me.”

Step Three:  Connect with the part of you who has the courage to speak your truth.

No matter how small it may currently appear, there is a part of you who believes beyond a sliver of doubt that you are meant to speak from the heart and share your message with the world.  Take time to become quiet, communicate with this part of yourself, and ask this part what it needs in order to lead the way.

Step Four:  Practice asking the guiding question, “How can I speak from the heart right now?”

When you ask yourself this when you wake up in the morning and when you fall asleep at night and many times in between, you will strengthen your “speaking from the heart” muscles.  When you find yourself feeling shy and scared, let that serve as a reminder to ask yourself what it would sound like for you to speak from the heart, right now, even though you’re scared.

Step Five: Know that speaking from the heart may sound surprising and exhilarating and very vocal, or it may be quiet, or you may choose to say nothing at all.  

You may notice yourself feeling the fear and sharing your message with courage, or you may notice the fear and choose to hold your message close to your heart.  There is no right way to speak from the heart.  It is simply a practice of cultivating self-compassion and dancing with what is right for you in each moment.

Do you have a message you want to share with the world? What does speaking from the heart mean to you? If you are ready to receive the support you need fully step into your calling and share your message with the world, I invite you to check out our professional coaching programs and then to apply for a discovery session when you’re ready to talk. All the best to you!


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