When I started career coaching over eleven years ago, and for many years after, I told my clients that my aim was to teach them how to do everything I did for them.
After a while, though, I came to understand that humans need each other. The neuroscience of how we humans heal our wounds, transcend obstacles, and clarify our next steps is clear—we humans are interrelational creatures like bees and ants and other primates.
We need other humans to offer sounding boards, warm accompaniment, and support us to reach our big goals.
So I stopped promising my clients complete self-sufficiency.
That said, there’s still a lot that I teach my clients to do for themselves. One thing is learning to ask better questions.
That’s such a good question!
In my coaching sessions, a client will often say—That’s such a good question!
Today, I want to offer you three sets of three career coaching questions that consistently help my clients get clear about what matters most to them and choose their next steps forward.
If you’re struggling to get clear about what’s next in your work life, I invite you to take a moment to get quiet, listen within, and write down your responses.
One. What do I need? What do I long for? What do I want?
When we’re stuck, we can make the mistake of asking ourselves, “Why can’t I… (fill in the blank)?” Or, “How can I get rid of (your problem goes here)?” But, if we focus solely on our problem, it can be much harder to see how to get to where we want to go.
I challenge you, instead, to envision the life you want.
What would it look like if your problem was magically resolved? What would you or others be doing differently? What do you need, want, and long for?
Don’t try to force yourself to paint a detailed picture of the life you want. Simply acknowledge the puzzle pieces or ingredients for what you want that you are able to see.
Allow yourself to write freely, jotting down any feelings, thoughts, or seemingly absurd notions that come up.
For help identifying what you need, I invite you to download my Priority Needs Wheel, a fun and quick way of assessing your current longings and priorities.
Two. What information do I need to gather? What questions do I have? What do other people—my ideal clients and employers, my current clients or employers, my family, etc.—want? Who might know something about this challenge I’m facing?
When facing a big decision, it’s important to get both the inside view and the outside view. The inside view is information you’re able to gather within yourself, including what you need, want, and long for.
In contrast, the outside view is information you’re able to gather outside yourself, including what other people need and want and what the data or people in the know have to say about your situation.
For example, if you’re considering starting a business, it can be helpful to take a look at market data about how similar businesses are faring in the current economy.
A helpful step to getting the outside view is to brainstorm a list of questions you have about the career decision you’re facing. Take a step back and get curious about who might help you answer these questions. Then, go gather information.
Three. Next Steps: What next step(s) will I take?
After getting the inside view and the outside view, it’s time to choose your next step. You might feel crystal clear about your next steps. Or, you might still feel pretty confused.
One reason why people can get stuck in confusion when facing a career change is that they expect themselves to know the right answer or the final destination.
But there is no right answer, and to get clear about where we’re headed, we must often take many smaller steps first—asking questions, having conversations, trying things out, and learning from what happens.
So, what next step(s) feel within your reach? What will you commit to doing in the next week to move toward clarity about what’s next in your career?
Now, ask yourself!
If you’re facing a big career decision, I encourage you to write this list of career coaching questions somewhere you’ll see them frequently or bookmark them on your computer—
- What do I need? What do I long for? What do I want?
- What questions do I have? Who might know something about this challenge I’m facing?
- What next step(s) will I take?
Then, stay curious, keep asking, and pay attention to what you discover.
I’d love to hear how these career coaching questions land with you!
May you discover a path forward of fulfillment and joy.